Blog 354: Sex in marriage only

sex in marriage

We all know the three lettered word: s.e.x but do we know what that really means? Did you wait? When are you going to have children? Have you ‘done’ it? Have you gone as far as you can without going all the way? God will forgive you if you do do ‘it.’ Have you talked to your friends about it? Do your parents know you do it? We live in a society where sex with anyone and everyone goes and sometimes it can become a competition or even a trophy between friends. All you seem to need to do is to hang around a group of people for a while and the conversation soon turns to sex, what you have and haven’t done, who it has been with and how good it has been. Sex before marriage will kill your marriage and the expectation that you have.

We all want to be accepted for who we are, we all want to be intimate with someone and we all want to have sex. You would be strange if you do not want it and crave for it. It is with this need that we choose whether or not to stick to our beliefs and faith or to step outside of them and choose what we want to do. A lot of people now watch porn, watch movies with sex in and crave it but it is not like how Hollywood want it to be shown, it can be painful, it can be scary and it is very very intimate between one man and one women. It is because of this that sex should only happen in marriage between a husband and a wife that are married to each other. It is a very special thing for a man and women on their wedding night to be able to have this time together and there needs to be respect from either party for it to be good and right. If it means on your wedding night instead of ‘doing it’ and talking about it then do that, you both need to understand the other person before you go straight into it.

When sex happens in marriage it is the coming together of two people who want to commit their life to each other, people who are virgins, people who have accepted to give their body to someone else and people who are going to respect the other person. This does not mean that you don’t talk things through-in order to have a good sex life you need to and you need to understand the other person on an emotionally level. Did you know that 90% of people in america have sex before marriage? Why? People are putting their faith to one side to start living with their partner, they make out with their partner and before they know it they are doing the ‘deed.’ There is a major conflict between faith and sex before marriage. People want to keep up with Jones and ‘do it’ before they get married, they almost want to boast about it, they want to tell their friends about the night- not only is this immature but in doing that they are not respecting their partner in any way shape or form.

That is an intimate moment that should be kept between the two of you and should be kept for after you are married. Most often than not for most people wanting sex and having faith do not align and they walk away from the church, they walk away from their friends, they walk away from their family, they walk away from seeking Christ and they walk away from Him overall. This does not have to be literal walking away-this could be moving to university and there are so many temptations and things to try out or this could be getting a new job and meeting new people or even going to college or dating apps. There are so many things in the world that wants to take our focus and love away from Christ that in the meantime it hurts us but most of all its hurts Jesus.

Maybe you have read this and have had sex before marriage and it has been hard for you, you have given yourself to someone else and are not with them anymore-I wonder how you feel? It will be hard and it will be a long journey ahead of you but if you focus on Christ and His love for you then you will be able to get through it and you will be able to focus on Him and not the world telling you what to do. No matter what your friends, family, colleagues or anyone is saying stand firm and keep your eyes on Jesus as He will help you and He will keep you close to Him as long as you try and stay close to Him. If you fail go to Him, ask him for forgiveness and to help you change your life around.

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