Today 10th October marks 4 months since I have been with my amazing boyfriend. You may have read my blog on singleness about 6 months ago but since then things have changed. I am now in a relationship with my best friend, Dan.
We first met in 2015 after I had come back from Colombia for six months and Dan had just finished university. I was thrilled to be home but was also nervous about what the future would hold and how I would be now the thrill of being away from home was waning off. The second Sunday I was home Dan was preaching and this was the first time that I knew that I wanted to be friends with this guy and see where it went from there.
We were both out of work and so were spending a lot of time together and we were giving each other mixed signals. After a long period of talking about it together and with others we decided that at that time it was not best for either of us and it was best if we were just friends. We had both just come out of the thrill of university and being abroad that we weren’t concentrating on our job situation. We needed space apart to be able to concentrate on what we needed to do rather that to be distracted by each other. We decided not to see each other outside of church activities and to only speak to each other then. Dan and I had a cooling off period, of I think about three months, which looking back now was probably best for both of us.
This hit me hard. At that point Dan was the only real friend I had and felt like I had lost him because I didn’t have a job and couldn’t settle down after the thrill and excitement of Colombia. I became sick, I wasn’t sure about myself and to be honest I really didn’t know why I was alive and what was the point in me still being on this earth. I did some stupid things and things that I regret doing, people that I regret not talking too and places that I regret going too. I wish now that I didn’t do those things and that I was sensible in the choices I made. In thinking back in the things I did I could have lost Dan as a friend but he knew that we both needed space and it was the best thing for us. He never took away his support and love but just showed it at a distance and I was grateful for that.
It was really at end of last year that we became really close again and we were able to talk about the past and how things changed and what we did and didn’t do and how we feel that we had a connection but we had to take things slowly and have God at the centre of all we do. It was after talking to people in and out of the church, people that we had both formed a good relationship with and our friends that we decided to start spending more time together just the two of us. From a young age I had prayed that God would lead me to a young godly man and it wasn’t until three years ago that I really thought that Dan was the person God was leading me to that I began to pray more earnestly. God answered my prayers.
We had spent loads of time together in a group and with our friends but now it was time to be able to spend time together just the two of us and so it was on 10th June Dan asked me out and the 13th June 2018 that we went on our first ‘offical’ date. We didn’t know what we were going to do, what we were going to talk about but as God lead us together He lead us through that. In all that we do we want to put God at the centre of our relationship and we want to be able to grow in our love and affection for one another. It is still early days and we do not know what the future will hold but what I do know is that God has lead us this far and He will continue to lead and guide us in the things that we do and say to each other.
God has used the last three years to change and nurture us, to use us, to develop us and I know in the years to come he will do the same. As Dan and I venture on this very special journey together I can’t wait to see how God uses us. I am excited for the future with Dan and so thankful to God that he drew us closer together and I have a good godly young man that I am able to call my boyfriend. I feel so blessed.